Some of you will be aware that Billy Burglar and his mates visited us once again overnight this last Sunday. From what we have been able to see we think that 9 allotments were attacked and a substantial amount of kit was again taken. They had so much that they had to abandon some of it near to the railway bridge because the lazy bastards were too tired to take it all home and later down to the pub for a sale. We have recovered a generator, a rotavator and a flame gun some of which we still have to get back to its rightful owners.
The government have now brought in a new set of rules to keep their farcical crime numbers low and that comes in the form of an instruction to your local cops stating that they can only take crime details from the person who was the victim. Therefore we cannot report the crime on your behalf. If you were one of the victims please contact PIO (I have no idea what a PIO is but its a civilian and not a proper copper) 4877 Candice Lagor, quoting incident number 138-002062014. She can be contacted by calling 101. She can also be contacted direct on her email: candice.lagor4877@nottinghamshire.pnn.police.uk
Good luck and a reminder to you all, if any was needed that this is the fifth time we have been attacked since last November. If you can take your good stuff home with you, do so if you don’t want it sold in the Green Barrel the next day for about a tenth of what you paid for it.
